Leaving my organization is quite hard and terribly sad. Despite my anger and bitterness over the take-over of our operations and the after-effects of the coup d'etat, I still love my organization's members throughout the state. And the last week has been wonderful as people learned of my departure and I saw many of them at our 3-day conference. I've been receiving emails and calls from my members absolutely shocked at my departure (most don't necessarily know about or understand the coup) and saying the nicest things about me and my relationship with them.

Throughout the conference I was constantly given hugs and hand-shakes and warm embraces and asked "why are you leaving us?" and "where are you going?" and told "but we need you" and "wish you the best" and "let me know if I can help" and so forth. (I even had one woman come up to me, after asking about my next job and finding out that I don't have one yet, exclaiming "you quit a job without having another one already lined up?" I said, "wow, you sound just like my mother." She said, "can you tell I'm a mother too?" I said, "tell me i'm 'not a spring chicken anymore' and you are definitely a mother.")

And then to receive that award in front of 300 of them and to get strong applause and thanks, very nice. It's heartwarming to feel so wanted and needed by people you work with. And it's especially nice coming from a field of work to which is a bit outside my normal career area-- it means to me that I can fit in and do good work wherever I choose.

So I will try to hold onto these positive thoughts and remember the good times, and try not to think further about the negative aspects outside of my control. I will take with me the knowledge that I did a good job, that I'm well-liked as a person and my work is appreciated, and that I am a strong and accomplished person on the whole.