Government Conspiracies:

They've stopped stocking my Juicy Juice all together at the stores now. It's been missing from the shelves for quite some time now. Today I asked about it and they said they no longer stock it. They said it in an eerie way, leading me to instantly believe there's a conspiracy afloat. I blame the Republicans and the new presidential administration. They know that my one weak link to survival is a constant supply of the stuff. Now, although dispirited, distorted, and dehydrated, I will not bow to their will. My thirst only makes me work harder to bring the Republicans down. I will have my Juicy Juice at last. I will not be overtaken by this government conspiracy. I will survive!