GAY LIFE

I've been thinking a lot about the Supreme Court decision today. What Gay person hasn't? But what's struck me about it is how far we've come as a community. This is a CONSERVATIVE court; in fact, probably more conservative than the court from the 1980's which came to the opposite conclusion and which today's court invalidated (can you believe it?). So why, unlike our friends in the Choice, Civil Rights, Labor, Women's, Liberal, Privacy, and Civil Liberties communities who keep losing or are holding onto a bare majority, why are We able to not only win today, but also have an earlier ruling overturned by this conservative court?

First, We haven't won everything. We've in fact lost many battles recently and over the years. And We will lose again. That's just the nature of constant vigilance. But We will also win again. And We won a big one today.

Secondly, it's not a giant new right. In fact, it's almost taken for granted that the police never enforce these laws and most states have already gotten rid of these very old laws. Even Georgia, the state in which the 1980's decision was from, got rid of their law even after going to the Supreme Court to defend it. It's also not a giant new step forward, as if we won marriage or complete acceptance or something new and big. It's really a b-a-s-i-c principle which lies at the cornerstone of our existence. And it pretty much fits within a "live and let live" philosophy; not a granting of anything.

Third, and MOST IMPORTANT, We did this. From living room to living room, family dinner to family dinner, community hall to community hall, coming out talk to coming out talk, difficult chat with Mom & Dad to difficult chat with Mom & Dad, we changed the hearts and minds of America. In the midst of all the conservatism over the years and the growing conservatism of our government and courts over the years We came out; We talked; We were proud; We were vocal; We lived our lives without shame; We participated in our families and our churches and our communities and our cities; We changed people's minds and hearts with just our being and our talking and our presence. We did this. And We should be proud.

While our friends in the Liberal communities continue to have troubles within the legal system (and we do too, no doubt), We have changed America and popular opinion and the judicial system and the country and the government just by being open and honest about our lives. There's a long way to go and, again, we haven't won everything or even that much legally. But societally, fundamentally, philosophically, and spiritually, We have won more than We may have thought possible before. And We did it ourselves, not because of any law or decision or president or governor or representative or petition. We did it from living room to living room. And We includes not just the full Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender community but also our Straight allies and family members who became not-afraid to speak out about their friends and family members. So here's to Us, all of Us, for speaking up and changing society. As Margaret Mead once said, "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed citizens can change the world; Indeed it's the only thing that ever has." We proved that today. So got out and be Proud today. And continue to Change the World.