almost two weeks ago i had dinner with my ex, the ex, the big ex where our relationship ended so badly that i swore off dating for years, um, 7 years and counting at this point. i never see my ex as he lives across the country. i never talk with my ex as we can't talk very well. but he was visiting and i ran into him on the street and we agreed to dinner and we talked for 3 hours or so. nothing was said about the past really. except to play catch up on our lives. major catch up since we haven't talked much or seen each other hardly at all over those 7 years. it was like a giant blast from the past of reconnecting with someone who was so close to me and who has since only lived in my head. oh yeah, this is who he is in real life.

by complete happenstance, Jessie happened by while we were talking and a convergence of my past and present melded. strange indeed. the stranger and more striking thing to note is how calm and easy it all was, really. no more hangups, no more personal drama, no more sadness or hurt or anger or bitterness or pain. just a simple dinner with someone from the past.

i've refrained from discussing this episode on here because it's very personal and even though i do get personal on here sometimes i was wary of getting into it with you. but it also seems to fit with what i spoke of in my last post about everything in my life seeming transitional right now. as if running into him and calmly putting that past away was part of a transition in life. i'm done with that past. i'm done with these things. and i'm ready for the new. it's the end of the world as i know it, and i really do feel fine. so, then, the question is, now what?