A lot of gay people have been the good little uncles and aunts when they go home to the weddings of their heterosexual relatives. It's time we demand nothing less than that for ourselves.

My sister found a great link to learning more about your personal preferences to the presidential candidates based on issues and not soundbytes: presidentialmatch.com. As expected I am more closely aligned with Kucinich and Sharpton than Kerry or Edwards, but of course they're not electable and mostly nuts, so the real choice for me is between Kerry and Edwards, and I still haven't decided.... I've got three more days to figure that out.

Remember when I said I'd be busy in 2004? Well, I am, with a whole new slew of activities. You know about the 2 jobs going on. Well, I've also just now started as the new Editor for the Newsletter of the Alice B. Toklas LGBT Democratic Club. I just finished putting together the content of the newsletter today and I'll link to it once it's finalized. But it's a pretty exciting and fun adventure that will keep me busy throughout the year too. More things to do.

Rosie's getting married now. Is Bush on the side of the mainstream or on the side of the EXtreme? The mainstream is accepting more and more that love and happiness is for everyone. The EXtreme lives in 1850.
We, too, have a dream of equality for all families... The only way changes are made in society is when people like Mayor Gavin Newsom have the courage to stand up against injustice.... I think the actions of the president are, in my opinion, the most vile and hateful words ever spoken by a sitting president... I am stunned and I'm horrified. I find this proposed amendment very, very, very, very shocking. And immoral.-- Rosie

The Democratic National Committee is working hard and on the side of right and good in developing a strong connection with Gay people throughout the country. And right now they're connecting with Margaret Cho to stop Bush's attack against Gay people. Good for her and them!

All Americans should be concerned when a President who is in political trouble tries to tamper with the Constitution of the United States at the start of his re-election campaign... He is looking for a wedge issue to divide the American people-- Senator John Kerry

Shocking! Just shocking! We have a right-wing, Republican conservative in the White House and he's for a constitutional amendment to the U.S. Constitution that would destroy Gay civil liberties. For those of you who thought he wouldn't come out for it and are actually shocked by his support for this anti-Gay, anti-civil rights, anti-human rights, anti-American stain on our freedoms in this country, I have one thing to say:

Helloooo!

More of the same: When the Bush Administration feels opposition, even from simple teachers, they're compared with terrorists. What more will they do this year to link those who don't follow lock-step with them to terrorists?

When you hear so many people in public office talking about fear, and marriage is just between a man and a woman, it does take a human toll on us because we're real human beings... The governor is my governor and Boxer and Feinstein are my senators. We're real people. It's not a political issue. It's our lives and love.

In regards to the same-sex marriages in San Francisco, Arnold Schwarzenegger had this to say over the weekend: "All of a sudden, we see riots, we see protests, we see people clashing. The next thing we know, there is injured or there is dead people. We don't want it to get to that extent''

What is he talking about?! There aren't any riots. Riots?! Does he remember what a riot is? This is just rhetoric to inflame the debate. If he is worried about riots he should talk about common ground and respect and community. He's taking the opposition to a whole new level now. And that's just shameful.

"His comments were inappropriate and shameful," [Assemblyman Mark] Leno said. "There were no riots in the street. There was peace, love and commitment."

Thoughts from my daily calendar, "Moving Forward, Keeping Still: The Gateway to Eastern Wisdom":

"A human life is like a single letter in the alphabet. It can be meaningless. Or it can be part of a great meaning."

spring cleaning in february? oh no you di-int! oh yes i did.
i hate cleaning, i'm glad it only happens once every few years

While the headlines about the recent poll on same-sex marriage in California state-- " TIGHTROPE: Politicians try not to anger voters -- 50% of Californians oppose same-sex unions"-- my reaction is, That's it?!? Just 50% oppose? That's not even a majority, that's at the half point. What was the number 1 year ago? What was that number 2, 5, 10 years ago? Much, much higher. In 1996, during the Defense of Marriage Act crap, the number was way higher. I take away from this headline, not that we're losing or that we're opposed. I take away from this headline that we are winning, and more quickly than any of us thought before. Get on the side of history. History is here. And we are ready for our equal rights.

Emanuel (volunteer coordinator for Boxer) & Senator Boxer,

I'm a practical Democrat. I'm a realistic Democrat. I want Senator Boxer and the Democrats to win handily this November. This is why I dedicated much of my free time over the last year to coming down to your offices and stuffing envelopes, making calls, faxing materials, fixing databases, helping with functions, promoting fundraisers, and offering any other help I could. That is why I wear my Boxer button on my backpack everywhere I go, everyday.

With that said, I am disappointed today. I really thought that Senator Boxer was smarter than to fall for anti-Gay rhetoric. I know that Senator Boxer is pro-Gay in general. I still commend her for standing up against the wholly anti-Gay Defense of Marriage Act in 1996-- especially when it was such a difficult thing to do in Washington at that time. I still highlight her stellar progressive record in the U.S. Senate on civil rights, women's rights, GLBT rights, and human rights to my friends and colleagues. So that is why I am rather saddened to see her using such anti-Gay rhetoric in today's newspaper by announcing via her staff that "she also agrees with the law's definition that marriage is between a man and a woman." Again, I understand her need to be practical and to win over the majority of Californians in November. But, why even enter the debate with this rhetoric? Why not state her long record for civil and GLBT rights, her strong commitment to working with the Gay community, and use language that isn't being propogated by the right? Why not utilize pro-Gay language and not fall into the trap by the right-wing regarding whether marriage is between 'a man and a woman'? There are other, more harmonious and pro-Gay ways to address this and be supportive of our Gay community and be practical in winning the statewide November race. And she will soon find herself on the wrong side of history.

Ever since our local clubs (Alice B. Toklas & Harvey Milk LGBT Democratic Clubs) held a joint fundraiser in the LGBT Community Center here in San Francisco last August I have been putting great pressure on them to hold another, much more high-profile one this year, during the election season, when more and more people would be interested in supporting her and fighting the Republicans. Today, with her using this rhetoric of the right, and falling into this trap, I'm not sure there would even be the interest in holding such a fundraiser. That's a practical detriment to her cause, and ours.

Again, I am a practical and realistic Democrat. And I have prepared myself, and told others to prepare, for our friends in politics to say some pretty bad things about our GLBT community, specifically related to the marriage issue, over the course of the 2004 election season. And I know that I certainly do not want the right-wing to be able to utilize my life as a wedge issue for them to get Bush a second term. And I know that they will do that in a minute. Somehow I believed that Senator Boxer would be able to be above the wedge issue and has worked closely beside us for long enough to couch any concerns in pro-Gay language, and not to fall into this right-wing trap.

There is no question that I will be voting for Senator Boxer this year. We need her in the U.S. Senate for a whole host of important reasons, including fighting against Bush in his right-wing endeavors, and fighting for the rights of Gay Americans. That said, I need to take some time off right now from the volunteering endeavors, I'm not sure how to talk to my friends and colleagues about her right now, and I've taken my button off my bag.

Yours,
Reese Aaron Isbell

It was appropriate and done in a way that we put a human face, a real story, behind the theory of discrimination... This has been extraordinary ... to see families finally feel pride, fully expressive of their partnership.-- Mayor Gavin Newsom

If [Bush] is elected in 2004, abortion will be criminalized in this country. We will continue to injure and kill millions of women in other countries by the gag rule and the withdrawal of funds for family planning, for AIDS education. And we will endanger many other advances we take for granted – Title IX and so on.
If Bush is elected, it will only breed disrespect for the government because it will put a right-wing extremist regime in a position to make decisions in our lives – decisions with which the majority doesn't agree. And I fear that fewer and fewer people will vote. We'll become more and more disillusioned with the government, and the very idea of democracy – the fact of democracy – will be damaged.
It's a truism to say democracy can't exist without feminism, because obviously democracy, if it means anything, means equal rights for all citizens. But feminism is part of it. The whole question of majority rule is threatened when so few people vote with so little knowledge of the issues that we get an unrepresentative, extremist government like we have now.-- Gloria Steinem

Rahul had his picture taken in the Chronicle with me this week. His parents didn’t know he was gay. They do now. Rahul: keep your head up and good luck with your family; we're here by your side.

"This is a good and holy thing. It's traditional family values at their best," said Rev. Karen Oliveto, pastor of the Bethany United Methodist Church. "God is doing a new thing in San Francisco, and we joyously enter into this journey for justice."

Newsom also invited Bush to San Francisco and meet with the first gay couple married, elderly lesbian activists Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin, to "discuss with them why they simply want the same rights, as a couple of 51 years, that my wife and I enjoy today."

P.S. for all those 'progressives' who fought against Newsom's election last fall because he was 'too conservative' and that the 'true progessives/Democrats should support the lefty Green': how you like my liberal Democratic Mayor Newsom now? Pretty cool, ain't he?

the question everybody was asking gay people today, after the long weekend: "did you get married this weekend?"

the question everybody was asking straight people today, after the long weekend: "did you know anyone who got married this weekend?"

They can't ever take this day away from us.

You know, this is the happiest moment, to see people who can get married, and if we can be here we make people so happy... Look at it. You can feel the energy here. Why wouldn't you want to do this?

So I felt the 'call' today. I felt the urgent need to get down to City Hall and be a part of what was happening. At least to be of witness. I don't get emotional often. It's hard for me. But once in a great while emotion sweeps over me and I feel a need to do something. Last night I felt a need to be down with my brethren. Today as I headed down I grabbed a disposable camera at a convenience store and made my way there, to City Hall. At first, I thought the line wasn't that long. But then I realized that the line in front of the building wasn't letting people in on the Van Ness Avenue side at all. It was actually curving around two times all the way to the other side-- the Polk Street side. Now, that's a long line. I took pictures of the camps and the lines, mostly umbrellas because of all the light rain going on all day/night. People camped out here all night-- all night! They stayed outside in the cold and rain in front of City Hall in the hopes that they could have their relationships dignified with a piece of official paper. That's dedication! And that's what this is all about. So many of them talked about how this was more than them and their relationship. This was about fulfilling a cause and showing America their love and normalcy. And this was about the simple recognition and eventual full-fledged rights accorded to their status. This was a beginning. I really felt a sense of history wash over me as I witnessed.

I didn't think I would get inside City Hall. They were not letting in anyone who wasn't in the long line to be married. Since City Hall was officially closed except for this activity and they were trying to handle the crowds as best they could, this was their appropriately deemed control. But I wanted to see the weddings inside, and feel the emotion, and learn. I only got in because I knew some people and we lied that I was there to be an official witness to a ceremony. Some guy named Richard (who I didn't know before) had a badge on and was trying to help a couple get their kids in. The door monitor was not allowing anyone in. She finally let the kids in and kept me away and kept asking who I was. I'm with them! I'm with them! I think she could tell I really wasn't. But Richard, bless his heart, grabbed my hand and said that I was with them and pulled me inside. And once inside, I was in. And Richard and I introduced ourselves.

Inside were three more very long lines. The line at the Clerk's office to apply for the marriage license. Long line. Then, after they finished that duty, they went to the long line near the steps of the City Hall where they would await an official to officially officiate their wedding. There looked to be at least 12 weddings going on at the same time constantly. This picture from this other guy's site really gives a good idea of how it looked, although the picture is missing the second floor balconies and all the weddings occuring in each of the sections of them: All of my pictures inside turned to mush with my disposable camera-- the flash was terrible and didn't work. So his picture's the best representation. So, anyway, after the long line of getting in the building, the long line to apply for the license, the long line for the officiation of the ceremony by a deputized official, the actual ceremony, and then there was one more long line, and that was to the certifying room where they got the actual certificate that says they had gone through the ceremony and were officially married. At that point, after a long time of being in and around City Hall, the newlywed couple would make their exit out of the only door open for exiting on this day. And upon opening the door all of the others waiting in line and all of the other bystanders and all the cameras and rice-throwers and bubble-blowing people would scream and holler and whoop and share in the love and the moment as the couple would thrust up high their new certificate of marriage and they would whoop and holler too. And then, many of them would say, 'lets go home.'
'Home,' such a simple thought. They've got a home and a life and are together. Why would this piece of paper matter? Why would they expend so much time and energy and give up so much for this paper. Because it does matter.

I said to my mother this morning. I said, you know, it's just different. Marriage means something more. It just does. I said, you know, for instance, we know that Wendy (my sister) and Houston (her boyfriend/partner) are together. And we know they are and they live together and we consider Houston a part of our family. But if they got married tomorrow, well, it would just be different. They would be 'married.' And they would be deemed a stronger and more committed bond, or something. They would be a 'real' couple. Not that they aren't now, but it would just seem that way. And they would have so many more rights than they do as a couple simply living together. That's why this is important. That's why domestic partnership rights are nice and sweet and wholesome, but they're not enough and they're not equality. It's one thing to say someone is 'partnered' with someone, and it's another to say they are 'married'-- with all the rights, responsibilities, and status that label affords. Honestly, I've never been one for the whole labeling issue-- I just want the rights, the full equal rights. But in a way, marriage is more than a label, it is a status. It can be a civil marriage rather than a religious one, but the word marriage carries that weight. Many, many people get married civilly, not in a church, just at City Hall or in a park or by Elvis in Las Vegas, or whatever and they are afforded the exact same name and treatment and status. I and my brethren in this fight for equality, we want nothing more than the same equal status that this simple paper and its power affords: this place at society's main table, this main course and not just the crumbs, this opportunity to be a part of the full bus and not just the back, this full-citizenship as the Americans we are and not the second-class-citizenship of before, this full equal respect and dignity and not just a 'tolerance' of our 'lifestyle,' this complete access to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Our relationships and loves and selves are real and strong and equal. We are queer and we are here and it's about time everybody else got used to it, cuz we ain't going nowhere! This is your land and this is my land, this is OUR land, and we are just as equal as anyone else and aren't asking for our rights anymore-- We are demanding them, now! It's time to end the second-class-citizenship, now. We deserve full equality as citizens and will fight for nothing less.

The spirit was just overwhelming... I really have not seen this kind of outpouring of support and love from the community and city workers [before]....
In the past we have taken a stand against policy that discriminates against interracial marriage. It took many years of fighting to end that. The California constitution at one point prohibited people of color from attending public school. It took court action to end that. We are in a new era of civil rights... San Francisco has taken a strong stand against this discrimination on same-sex marriage. Again, it's going to take many years and a tough legal battle to change it. But I am absolutely confident that at the end of the day we are going to win.

It just goes to show you what we have to go through, and then you have Britney Spears who just did it in a few minutes... It is hard when you go to other people's weddings and you almost feel a little angry because you can't get married.

Voices from a historic weekend:

With this ring, I thee wed

I now pronounce you spouses for life

I feel the weight of history, in a way that I never felt before... It is remarkable and profound

The history of our nation has demonstrated that separate is seldom, if ever, equal

This probably isn't the way anyone would dream up their dream wedding. But it's still a dream. It's a dream come true

Everybody has a right to love each other. It's a civil rights issue. It's time for us to get off the back of the bus

I'm just watching... and saying, 'Right on!'

We've been waiting longer than Britney Spears' marriage lasted

It's a special day in San Francisco... You feel the energy, excitement and enthusiasm, not just here in City Hall but around the Bay Area and the state, and for that matter around the rest of the nation and the world

I keep tearing up as I do this, and I've been doing this for hours," Leno said, as he filled out yet another marriage certificate. "I didn't think it would get to me. What's happening here is so humane. Our opponents will come to learn that.

To be here and be part of history is totally worth it... To have a marriage certificate -- we'll probably frame it. And if it's not legal tomorrow, it'll be legal some day

We've been together 30 years, and we've been married one day

we want all the rights that come with marriage. There are 1,049 federal rights that come with civil marriagewe want all the rights that come with marriage. There are 1,049 federal rights that come with civil marriage

Love, commitment and domesticity have descended on the state capital. Beware

We normally do about 20-30 couples a day. We're doing about 50-60 an hour

My parents are getting married... Congratulations... You're not living in sin anymore

It may seem premature to some Americans, but for 83-year-old Del Martin and 79-year-old Phyllis Lyon, it was a long time coming.... The hour has arrived to decide whether there is any rationale -- in a nation guided by a constitution assuring "life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" -- for government to deprive some Americans from the rights and responsibilities of marriage.

this is our Boston Tea Party... the time has arrived.

at a lesbian wedding, call u soon

as i text messaged the above to jessie from cell-to-cell to return his call for lunch, i thought to myself, how often does one get to say something like that? san francisco is a madhouse of weddings and marriage proposals and love and hope and empowerment right now. everybody is getting married. my friends who got married today threw together a ceremony and everything in 24 hours. no one knew a few days ago that all this would be happening. but now, everybody's doing it. and those who aren't, want to. a woman at the lesbian wedding jokingly asked me to marry her at city hall today too, just because everybody's doing it. but i said, i can marry you (a woman) anyday, i need to find me a man quick cuz i only got two days! so, yeah, tuesday will come and the courts will put a stop to the same sex weddings, but for a brief time, right now, san francisco is in love with love. and everybody wants to join in. even sorta me.

a beautiful picture from jessie which perfectly symbolizes this week's gay marriages in san francisco. jessie should really be a professional photographer. oh, wait, he is.

love and marriage are everywhere in san francisco right now. least of which, at city hall. it's hard to describe. it's everywhere and overpowering. and really amazing. i didn't make it down to city hall yesterday for the beginning of the historic marriages. but i went down there this evening. and there were lines, upon lines, upon lines of gay and lesbian couples waiting to get their licenses, waiting to do the paperwork, and waiting for an official to make it official. high emotion was everywhere. gay people were everywhere. my people were everywhere. and they were showing their love and getting an official statement from the city saying that they were bonded for life together. most of these couples had already been 'married' in spirit for 10, 20, 30, 40, or even 50 years, never imagining that they would be able to be recognized by a government body, completely. all of these couples recognized how little window there was for this as they ran to city hall to do it quickly before the courts probably stop it next week. but until that time, for a brief few days of marriage after marriage after marriage, and love and devotion and care and beauty and relationships, until next week, for a few days, these couples will have shown brightly and this valentine's day, this marriage day for them, will mean everything. in a small way it made me want to grab someone and marry them today too, but i'm not ready and not involved. but it did make me want to take part in the events. seeing all the love everywhere, you wonder what the fuss is really about from the opponents. but whatever. these few days of marital bliss in san francisco leaves one's heart open and proud.

tomorrow i'm going to the wedding ceremony of my dear friends esther and lisa as they tie the knot, officially, in the US, for the first time. they've been together for years. they even officially got married in canada where it was becoming legal a year or two ago. but now, they're going to get married in their home city, in the US of A. and i'm going to watch them, and celebrate their marriage with them. because we can. officially, for the first time.

"It reminds me how important rituals are in our lives," Maloney said afterward, standing beside his new husband, whom he met at a San Francisco cafe 14 years ago. "As gay men, we've been denied these rituals. I thought it would be political, but it was quite emotional."

I asked Del and she said OK.

Wow.

Unreal. Bush is such a hypocrite! He's actually lambasting the thing he wants more of. See for yourself. Bush: "These terrible weapons are becoming easier to acquire, build, hide and transport." At the exact same time, he's not signing international treaties limiting them, he's putting into his budget, every year of his tenure, more and more funding for nuclear warheads and programs, and yet, he's declaring them 'terrible.' This is obviously just electioneering crap. I hate him so much!

While... Bush stands up to tell the world about his anti- proliferation proposal, Congress is sitting down to consider his pro- proliferation budget. [Bush]'s budget includes more than half a billion dollars over the next five years to develop a nuclear bunker buster and other new nuclear weapons but has no significant increases in nonproliferation programs. These misguided priorities will hasten, not slow, the spread of nuclear weapons.

I find it a dismaying part of public life that guns can be given a protection against lawsuits that no other industry has.-- Democratic California Senator Dianne Feinstein. Go Dems!

Democrats are starting to get their "voice back." Well, it's about time! And we're taking the White House back for everyone. Have you noticed the unprecedented number of people voting in the Democratic primaries this season? There's a reason. People are ready and anxious to get Bush out of there. Yeahhhhh!

Tim Russert: "Why do you think you are perceived as such a divider?"
Bush: "Gosh, I don't know, because I'm working hard to unite the country."

The audacious ludicrousness of that answer dumbfounds me. I can't stop laughing.

These Gay penguins sound so cute! I love the way they raised a baby penguin together. So cool! Anyone have pictures?

Been busy. Did I mention I'm now working two (2) jobs? As my mom says, 'better than none.' Actually I'm really enjoying both of them. They're just keeping me busy. And then I read the following Zen saying from my daily calendar: "Those in a hurry do not arrive." And I remember to remain calm during the busy times. And I do.

This is my family, series
This is my brother

Never shy of a debate
Always has an opinion
On everything
Listens, but definitely talks
Keeps the family up to date on the latest scifi, movie, tv, and games news
Used to wear hooded robes while playing Dungeons & Dragons with his friends
Wouldn't suprise me if he still does
He's cool like that
Was known as "The Joker" in high school
As in the Jack Nicholson version from "Batman"
Dressed the part often too
Yes, and with the makeup
Can talk to anyone, young, old, strange, cool, hip, wild, well-dressed, or sweats-wearing
Can talk to them for hours
About anything
Anything.
Consults me about politics and voting even though he's always considered himself way more conservative than I
Tells me why I'm 'wrong'
Listens to me tell him why he's 'wrong'
Puts up a good fight
But understands that I don't like a fight and always fall back into joke-mode, or feigning innocence
Likes toys even more than I do
Thinks he's my niece's 'favorite uncle' even though we all know I am
Understands why I give him toys, children's stuff, and comics for presents
He likes it too
Loses to me at Clue everytime
Ha
Takes games VERY seriously
Making an amazing life for himself wherever he goes
Moved from Kansas City to Los Angeles to help my sister out with my niece
How awesome is that?
Cares deeply about his family
Wishes, hopes, dreams, fantasizes, thinks
And did I mention dreams?
Still hasn't visited me in SF yet
Hopefully soon
Loves his family
This is my brother

today is a really great day!

Jessie came over last night for a quick update for my computer. He's decided now that it's dying a slow death and needs to be put out of its misery. A new computer is in order. Well, I needed to spend money again so I guess that's coming up soon. Afterwards, Chris and Jessie talks computer talk for a long while about my computer needs and inabilities. The following conversation really happened, although it's been slightly modified for dramatic effect:

Chris to Reese: "Who's your FTP?"
Reese: "You want to know the name of my florist?"
Jessie to Chris: "See, this is what I'm dealing with."
Reese: "No, seriously, isn't FTP the name of a florist?"
Chris: "That's FTD."
Reese: "Oh, right. What's an FTP?"

Once again, I say, I want to go back to handwriting and candle light.