Tuesday, June 29, 2004

For if this nation is to remain true to the ideals symbolized by its flag, it must not wield the tools of tyrants even to resist an assault by the forces of tyranny.

Monday, June 28, 2004

Take that, G.W.
Michael Moore's "Fahrenheit 9/11" made Hollywood history by selling $21.8 million worth of tickets in its first three days, becoming the only documentary ever to outgun all other blockbuster films at the nation's box offices in one weekend.... [and] was released on only 868 screens.
I purposefully went to the show this weekend in order to be part of the 'event,' standing in line for two hours after barely eeking out a ticket to another sold out showing. It was worth seeing and should be seen by all-- I really don't even get the 'R' rating since I've seen way worse out there that get even PG's.

Sunday, June 27, 2004

I actually had some fun this year at Pride. I mean, it was work as usual and I'm tired and my feet hurt and I got bored a lot and I hate crowds and crowds often make me feel alone and overwhelmed. But there were some times when I found myself enjoying it, feeling the energy, making new friends, bonding with newer friends, whooping it up in the parade down market street, and being the go-to-guy for stickers for Kerry. And it was a gorgeous day today too. Not bad.

Saturday, June 26, 2004

Two thoughts from my daily calendar, "Moving Forward, Keeping Still: The Gateway to Eastern Wisdom":

"How old would you be if you didn't know how old you was?"-- Satchel Paige

"Heavent-sent calamities you may stand up against, but you cannot survive those brought on by yourself."-- Shu Ching

Friday, June 25, 2004

On a 'lighter' note, I stood in a very long line to see the sold-out showing of Michael Moore's new movie "Fahrenheit 9/11" which is difficult and heartbreaking to watch, but definitely worth watching. Everyone should see this, particularly the parts with the mother who lost her son. That's some real emotion that is just there, on screen. Real.

Why is our government time after time ruining the reputations of people, charging them with being in concert with terrorists and then having to drop all of the charges and then releasing them? There are too many abuses that are occurring and we need to make sure that innocent Americans are not being dragged under like they have.

Hope to see you at Pride this weekend. Find me at the Kerry for President booth located on the little street between the Asian Art Museum and the Main Library. I'll be there Saturday from 9am-12noon and Sunday in the afternoon (say 1:30 or so and beyond), after I finish marching with Assemblyman Mark Leno who's early in the parade. Come by and say hi.

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

"Wanna freak out the tourists?"

I'm walking to work today, just passing the cable-car turn-around where all the tourists gather like pigeons around half-eaten bread, waiting for their turn to ride the infamous San Francisco treat, when I spot N. N is someone I dated very, very briefly a year ago. He's oh-so-cute and we hug and smile.

Then I stare into his beautiful eyes and I jokingly query, "Wanna freak out the tourists?" by which I mean kissing with passion and lips locked and tongues lashing, right in front of the flock of midwesterners lost in the big Gay city.

We smile. It's Pride in a few days, the city is rainbow draped and flags are flying, millions of Gay people are here or coming here for the weekend, and tourists are the voyeurs of americana, so it's safe to say we felt the power to freak people out without repercussion.

Knowing that we have the power to freak is sometimes enough. And we smile at each other. I grab his soul patch between my thumb and my forefinger as I dart off, smiling once again at the thought of the us having any power at all, in a larger society as close-minded and troubled and discriminatory as it is. The little things can mean so much, even when they're just for fun.

1973: I am not a crook.

2004: I have never ordered torture.

'Nuff said.

Tuesday, June 22, 2004

jessie,

i was thinking in the middle of the night last night when i couldn't sleep, always a strange time to think.

this halloween will be our 5th anniversary of knowing each other. and i think we should celebrate like a real anniversary.

you're my brother/lover-in-spirit and our relationship means a lot to me. we're more than just friends. and if we were lovers we'd celebrate it. so sex seems to be the key to an anniversary in this society. but, for once, let's take sex off the table. (i prefer the bed anyway)

and let's celebrate our special relationship with a nice dinner or something fun this anniversarial halloween. and we can celebrate the sweet love we make every day. :-)

reese

SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE

my old d.c. office of americans united is hard at work fighting bush's/republican's attempts to make churches political machines for the republican party:

What's different this year is the Bush/Cheney campaign are initiating efforts to get churches to break the law by becoming centers of Bush campaign activity... [my old boss Rev. Barry] Lynn, an ordained minister in the United Church of Christ... said he found Bush's recent round of Vatican lobbying... particularly egregious. That, Lynn said, was in sharp contrast with President John Kennedy, the last Roman Catholic to run for president on a major party ticket. Kennedy went out of his way to assure voters that the pope and U.S. bishops would not influence his policies. "It's incredible,'' Lynn said. "Bush is doing the very thing Kennedy vowed not to do. ... It has shocked many people, including many Catholics...

This is the most shocking example of politicizing churches I've ever seen... The last thing this country needs is a church-based political machine. The Bush campaign should abandon this plan immediately. By enrolling churches in an election scheme, the Bush campaign is endangering those churches' tax exemptions... That's bad enough, but the introduction of partisan politics into the pews will also divide congregations and entangle politics and religion in very unhealthy ways.

Monday, June 21, 2004

so, in two weeks i'm heading on a road trip with my parents and my niece. somehow they've convinced me that i'll enjoy sleeping in a tent for a few nights of our adventure. you can see my mother standing in their new, very large, tent below:

i am looking forward to getting out of town and having a good time with my family. i'm also very much into my 24-hour train trip home after they drop me off in tacoma, washington. peace, quiet, solitude. my kinda vacation.

I'm very sure [al-Quaida] can't have a better [U.S.] administration [i.e. Bush] for them than the one they have now.

Saturday, June 19, 2004

so i was doing some research of the southern baptist websites, per my post a few days ago and how they wish to befriend us. i couldn't find any guidelines or materials on that subject, but i did find some absolutely fascinating references and backgrounders for their parishoners on who we are and our 'agenda'. most intriguing was the following, obviously 'fact-based' list of diagnoses (be forewarned before reading that this is scary on a number of levels...):

"Signs of HIV Infection:

* Unexplained, extreme tiredness.
* Unexplained fever, shaking chills or night sweats lasting longer than a few weeks.
* Swollen glands (enlarged lymph nodes) at multiple sites, such as in the neck, armpits or groin, which are otherwise unexplained and persistent.
* Pink or purple flat or raised blotches, usually about the size of a quarter, occurring on or under the skin, inside the mouth, nose, eyelids, or rectum. At first they may look like bruises, but they are firmer than the surrounding skin, are painless, and do not disappear.
* An unexplained and unintended weight loss of more than 10 percent of your total body weight over a period of one or more months.
* A persistent thick, whitish coating on the tongue or in the throat.
* A dry cough which has lasted too long to be caused by a common respiratory infection, especially if accompanied by a shortness of breath.
* Pain in the esophagus (food pipe) when swallowing.
* Confusion, personality changes, loss of memory and equilibrium.
* Chronic diarrhea that usually lasts a couple of weeks to a month…This leads to the wasting syndrome.
"

and so, this makes me think that they must be wary of just about anyone who has the flu, cold, high fever, depression, or any other symptoms of a regularly-occurring sickness....

Thursday, June 17, 2004

Beware of Southern Baptists bearing false witness:

Earlier this year, the Southern Baptist Convention started an initiative to "liberate" gays from their homosexuality by befriending them and convincing them they should accept Jesus as their savior. Church leaders asked their 42,000 churches to reach out compassionately to gays, focusing on how Christianity can save them.

they're so inspiring and gracious to be thinking of us in our times of need, and wanting to be our friends, even though they think we're vermin scum... so nice... i gotta go out and make a Southern Baptist friend today!

"Bipartisan group of VIPs decries Bush's policies"

"Retired Envoys, Commanders Assail Bush Team; Administration Unable to Handle 'Global Leadership,' 27-Member Group Asserts"

Deep concern about the current state of our nation's international relations compels us, 27 men and women who have served the United States in senior diplomatic, national security, and Military positions, to speak out and call for a fundamental change in the United States' approach to foreign policy....

I would add that to be involved in an act that will be seen by many as political if not partisan is for many of us a new experience. As career government officials, we have served loyally both Republican and Democratic administrations. We have not only worked overseas; we have also held positions of major responsibility in the Department of State, Department of Defense, National Security Council, and at the United Nations. For many of us, such an overt step is very hard to do and we have made our decisions after deep reflection....

Today we see that structure crumbling under an administration blinded by ideology and a callous indifference to the realities of the world around it. Never before have so many of us felt the need for a major change in the direction of our foreign policy....

The undersigned have held positions of responsibility for the planning and execution of American foreign and defense policy. Collectively, we have served every president since Harry S. Truman. Some of us are Democrats, some are Republicans or Independents, many voted for George W. Bush. But we all believe that current Administration policies have failed in the primary responsibilities of preserving national security and providing world leadership. Serious issues are at stake. We need a change....

The Bush Administration has shown that it does not grasp these circumstances of the new era, and is not able to rise to the responsibilities of world leadership in either style or substance. It is time for a change....


and check out the list of signatories-- very impressive list of bipartisan knowledgeable leaders

what's left for bush to say-- 'no one agrees with me, and therefore i'm the only patriotic american left'? bush: it's over, you've lost all respect of everyone

Wednesday, June 16, 2004

as a followup to my last post: what is a 'byte' and is it good to have a 'mega' one or a 'giga' one and, what exactly are 'megas' and 'gigas'? what language are we speaking? is this english? i'm so confused.

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

i don't understand technology. i just don't. none of it makes sense to me.

with that said and well established amongst my readers, i get an email yesterday from my yahoo service saying that i won't be getting any more emails from anyone until i empty out some of my old emails, that i thought i could store, because i'm out of storage space. whatever storage space means anyway.... so, i'm supposed to delete or pay money for a bigger storage unit.

so late last night i spend an hour or so deleting tons and tons of hopefully useless emails that i think i may not ever need again. deleting, deleting, deleting for fear that there's some unknown email out there that i'm not receiving.

and then today, this morning in fact, i get an email from yahoo saying that they've happily increased my storage unit capacities and that i'm one lucky guy. and then i read this article in the paper today: "Yahoo expanding e-mail storage; Increase regarded as effort to defend against Google"

i don't even understand that or anything, other than i understand that my old email that i deleted is gone forever and i'll never get it back....

(unless of course someone takes me to court and wants to see all of my old email ramblings because, as technology/privacy people are always telling us all the time, our email is never deleted and is stored somewhere and can be used against us in a court of law... p.s. it's now even true of rants we say via text messages on our cell phone. when will technology learn to help us rather than harm us?)

now it would seem that i'm eating my 'fresh' vegetables when i heat up my famous fish sticks and fries in the oven, at least according to bush:

"Feds classify french fries as fresh veggies"

Monday, June 14, 2004

This is a fascinating look at the new Harry Potter movie. For those who have seen it, and even for those who haven't or couldn't care less about seeing it, and especially for movie buffs in general, this article pours into some deep philosophical structures of symbolism ripe throughout the movie and made by the gifted director. Great read.

There is no justification, legal or moral, for the judgments made by Mr. Bush's political appointees at the Justice and Defense departments. Theirs is the logic of criminal regimes, of dictatorships around the world that sanction torture on grounds of "national security."

Once the phone booth was the place where Clark Kent could protect his privacy. Now cell- phoners strip in public. City folks who long ago cultivated a way of avoiding eye contact are now supposed to avoid ear contact.

That Bush is mounting an unprecedented attack on secular government -- at a time when America is under attack by religious terrorists supported by religious regimes -- is morally obscene.

why is a protestant telling the head of the catholic church what to do?
"It is just unprecedented for a president to ask for help from the Vatican to get re-elected, and that is exactly what this is."-- The Rev. Barry Lynn, executive director of Americans United for Separation of Church and State

the real reagan legacy

In 1982 AIDS infected 1200 and killed nearly 500. In the Tylenol scare of the same year, seven people died from cyanide laced capsules. Within five weeks the FDA had 1100 employees testing millions of pills. They filled 11,000 pages, in 26 volumes, with probe reports.

Between the middle of 1981 and the middle of 1982, the Centers for Disease Control spent less than $1 million on what was then called, GRID, or “gay-related immune deficiency,” but $9 million on Legionnaire’s disease....

AIDS killed two generations of gay men in America, and the lasting legacy of their death will be silence about the realities of the epidemic.

Friday, June 11, 2004

CDC researchers did not immediately know why the overall rate [of suicide among American youngsters and teens] dropped, but a specialist in adolescent medicine said new safety measures for keeping guns out of children's hands and greater acceptance of gays may have played important roles.

during this week of all-reagan-all-the-time, i've kept silent. everybody deserves respect, especially during their funeral period, and it is appropriate that they are accorded that formality.

but, this week of wake has been a bit long for those of us, particularly in the gay community, who know how much he decimated our lives, our people, our community. the one place in all the news this week where i've seen true reminescene of that anger has been in the gay press where there have been all kinds of reminders of just how much he did to make sure that we were killed off and allowed to die as a new fatal disease ravaged our people. this wasn't just a lack of knowledge or science in hiv/aids; this was a concerted effort to ignore this growing threat because of the 'they deserve what they get' attitude by him and his administration.
so for all of my gay brethren that i'll never meet because they died before my time, particularly here in san francisco; for all my gay brethren who currently have hiv/aids and are putting up with its daily personal destruction of their body; for all my gay brethren who have lucked out and don't have hiv/aids but who live in fear or panic or ocd-related trips of the possibility of getting hiv/aids; for all my gay brethren who have lived through the worst two week so of their lives as they wait to find out if they're negative or positive; for all my gay brethren that can't bear the burden of its effect of our world and our personal lives and who hide away from the world or leave it; for all my gay brethren i'll never meet; for all my gay brethren who died in the 80's and 90's and today; for all of my gay brethren who had to learn to take care of themselves when everyone abandoned them; for all of them, and for me, i am still angry and still remember and cannot be silent any longer while he is deified as a saint to all people. he is not a saint, his administration allowed our community to die off, and they have our years and years of blood on their hands.

Wednesday, June 09, 2004

And another great thought from my daily calendar, "Moving Forward, Keeping Still: The Gateway to Eastern Wisdom":

"We all want to be famous people, and the moment we want to be something we are no longer free."-- J. Krishnamurti

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

intense emotions from another:
I miss you and yet, I don't even remember you. I remember what you represent... but I don't remember what you look like, what you sound like, how you were, or what it felt like to be with you. It's all disappearing. My memories of you are starting to vanish and that scares me. And while all of those things are slowly fading, what hasn't are the details of that day. Those I can remember clearly... the way you wouldn't even look at me, and when you did, the way your eyes burned right through me, the disgust in your voice, the panic and fear I felt, being in complete shock as I drove home. I'm still in that shock, I think. I'm numb. I'm empty.

I hold on because I fear that if I don't, I'll forget about you and lose you completely. I guess I'm not ready for that. The thing is, I know that you'll never come back. I know that it's entirely impossible that we'd ever work this out and it'll never be the way I wanted it to be. I know that I need to let you go. It has to end somehow, but how? When?

The March memorandum also contains a curious section in which the lawyers argued that any torture committed at Guantánamo would not be a violation of the anti-torture statute because the base was under American legal jurisdiction and the statute concerns only torture committed overseas. That view is in direct conflict with the position the administration has taken in the Supreme Court, where it has argued that prisoners at Guantánamo Bay are not entitled to constitutional protections because the base is outside American jurisdiction.

Mr. Ashcroft replied that it was simply not good policy to openly debate what powers a president had in wartime.

Thoughts from my daily calendar, "Moving Forward, Keeping Still: The Gateway to Eastern Wisdom":

"We can never have enough of that which we really do not want."-- Eric Hoffer

Monday, June 07, 2004

Quite a descriptive picture of the current White House scene:

In interviews with a number of White House staffers who were willing to talk off the record, a picture of an administration under siege has emerged, led by a man who declares his decisions to be “God’s will” and then tells aides to “f**k over” anyone they consider to be an opponent of the administration.

“We’re at war, there’s no doubt about it. What I don’t know anymore is just who the enemy might be,” says one troubled White House aide. “We seem to spend more time trying to destroy John Kerry than al Qaeda and our enemies list just keeps growing and growing.”

Aides say the President gets “hung up on minor details,” micromanaging to the extreme while ignoring the bigger picture. He will spend hours personally reviewing and approving every attack ad against his Democratic opponent and then kiss off a meeting on economic issues....

West Wing staffers call Bush and Ashcroft “the Blues Brothers” because “they’re on a mission from God.” “The Attorney General is tight with the President because of religion,” says one aide. “They both believe any action is justifiable in the name of God.”

But the President who says he rules at the behest of God can also tongue-lash those he perceives as disloyal, calling them “f**king a**holes” in front of other staff, berating one cabinet official in front of others and labeling anyone who disagrees with him “unpatriotic” or “anti-American.”

“The mood here is that we’re under siege, there’s no doubt about it,” says one troubled aide who admits he is looking for work elsewhere. “In this administration, you don’t have to wear a turban or speak Farsi to be an enemy of the United States. All you have to do is disagree with the President.”

The constitutional amendment's number in Missouri on the August 3rd ballot is #2.

NO ON 2 on August 3!

Sunday, June 06, 2004

For my fellow Missourians:

There's a new statewide coalition formed working against the constitutional amendment on the August 3rd primary ballot. It's called the Constitution Defense League (the main statewide GLBT advocacy group for Missouri, PROMO, is part of their coalition) and they've got their work ahead of them. They're organizing volunteer opportunities throughout the state, specifically in the metro cities of Kansas City and St. Louis, so if you're available and have time, or money, to help support, sign up with them. Beyond that, one of the biggest ways you can help is by making sure your friends and family are registered to vote and making sure they do vote August 3rd against this anti-Gay bigotry. And for those who don't live in Missouri, spread the word with family, friends, friends of friends, community groups, whatever, to make sure they're registered to vote and that they need to vote August 3rd. Use your own personal power to spread the word and help.

This constitutional amendment isn't about 'marriage'; this is about an agenda of discrimination, hatred, and fear. It's about amending our state's ultimate governing document with language antithetical to true constitutional stewardship. And, politically, it's about helping the right-wing Republicans get out the vote for their candidates and causes in the election.

And for you and me, it's about time we put an end to our lives being used as a political wedge issue.

Friday, June 04, 2004

it's so rare anymore that i get caught up in a movie. most of the time i'm either finding faults, because there's always a lot of faults in hollywood, or making fun of terrible dialogue, or bored, bored, bored. i watch a lot of movies, yes, but that doesn't mean that i actually enjoy them for the cinematic reasons. mostly, i enjoy rolling my eyes at movies. except for interesting independent movies that have storylines and real people dialogues and such, sometimes those movies work for me. all this said, i really don't get into big hollywood movies that much, especially big blockbusters of the summer because they're always too over the top for me.

i say all of this because tonight i watched a big summer blockbuster movie, troy, and it was 2 1/2 hours long. and i was not once bored. i found myself letting silly dialogue slide away. i actually enjoyed this movie for its cinematic presence and for being a large-scale epic of a movie. i credit that to a lot of the acting, particularly eric bana, brad pitt, and peter o'toole, who all three kept me interested and invested in what was happening and going to happen. eric bana was really amazing and had a presence on screen that i long for in most actors. it's too bad 'the hulk' didn't work out for him, because he deserves a star vehicle. he's an amazing actor.

i almost wished that i didn't know the age-old story of the trojan horse, because i feel it would have been a splendid surprise since the movie never really gave the viewer a definite choice of good guy/bad guy roles. so, since i knew about the trojan horse, i felt a sense of sadness that i knew what was generally going to happen. and that sadness was there because i was genuinely interested in the plot and what was to happen with the characters.

it's not the greatest movie ever done, and it did have flaws, and i'm not even sure i'd want to watch it again as it's such an event. but, but, but the fact that i never got bored and i can't stop thinking positively about the movie and i actually enjoyed a movie for its cinematic experience is an amazing thing in and of itself. i really did like 'troy.'

Thursday, June 03, 2004

it's coming sooner than expected.... in august

Wednesday, June 02, 2004

this is a truly beautiful article featuring my friends Esther and Lisa who got married on Valentine's Day this year, for the third time, and probably not the last time, as they're going to try and get married in Massachusetts later this year. they're such a cute couple. i can't wait for Esther to email me that picture of me with them at the wedding so i can post it on here for all you to see (hint, hint, esther....)

what a dif'rence a day makes...

Tuesday, June 01, 2004

"He just f---s California..."

Really, truly disgusting.